Bebe Le Strange

There is no real reason for this entry's title except that it popped into my head today. I believe it's the name of an album from the '80s from a band I can't currently remember. If people ever commented on my blog, I'm sure someone could think of it. ;)

Now that we have some information--such as it is--and CCAI "believes" that the group of matches mailed yesterday will include only remaining March families, I am of two minds. In one, I feel myself relaxing, in the manner of "Oh, we won't be going to China until March! Might as well learn to play the guitar." Two, "Well, Jumpin' Jehosephat (how the hell do you spell Jehosephat?)! We have a baby coming! Not a moment to waste!"

It's the second mind that guided me at Ralph's today, where I made the conscious decision to troll the aisles for baby-related "stuff." Most of it comes from the China adoption "travel tips" lists I've been gathering from the internet. Because I'm a researcher, I feel the need to collect about 200 of these and look for trends. Then I can present my analytical findings at a conference. ;) But there are also the disturbing anomalies, the people who feel certain I will need Wellington boots or five sizes of Tupperware containers and I can't imagine why. But then, what do I know? I've never been to China, and I've never been anywhere with a baby. My favorite comment so far was the fellow who noted that we shouldn't worry if we forget detergent--"I found it in the supermarket in Kathmandu." It's not every day you can make this statement accurately. :)

So, I'm slowly rolling up the aisles in Ralph's, and discovering all sorts of things. For instance, Earth's Best organic baby food (recommended by Baby Bargains over the Gerber crapcake) is actually *cheaper* than non-organic brands. And, Baby Bargains wasn't fooling around when they said to check the expiration dates: all of the applesauce and a good measure of the carrots expired this past summer. As I searched, I grew bold: why, if she yums up pears and bananas, dare I venture some butternut squash? I dare, and I do. I found disposable washcloths (something I've been told I'll need) and a set of plastic keys (keys and plastic cellphones are mentioned repeatedly as the portable toys of choice.) My hand fluttered over some organic vanilla baby biscuits, but honestly? I was afraid I'd eat them all. ;)

At the checkout, I displayed my haul on the conveyor belt with trepidation: would the checker want to know why I, who have no baby to speak of, was buying a dozen jars of baby food and some plastic keys? My heart pounded as she scooped them up and tossed them unceremoniously into bags. She never said a word. Because here's a newsflash: people buy baby food every day. They buy it because babies eat it. And babies are tiny people. And tiny people are necessary for big people. Who then shop in supermarkets, often accompanied by other tiny people. It's a pretty routine cause and effect, if you stop to ponder it. Which probably only infertile people do.

"Thank you, and have a nice day," she said grimly, ripping off a length of store coupons and handing them to me with my receipt. I looked and they were for $1.00 off the organic babyfood. And you know how they know which coupons to give to people? They track your purchases. And you know who purchases baby food?

I think you see where I'm going here.