Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Day 16: I Shall Wear The Bottoms Of My Trousers Rolled

Strange observations about aging:

1. Getting my hair colored is no longer just for fun, on my terms, whenever I feel like it. Now it's part of the upkeep of the physical plant, and there's something a little grim about it.

2. Everybody calling me "Ma'am." Hello, do I look like "Ma'am" to you? Oh yeah, apparently I do.

3. Not getting to play the ingenue, even though I really, really want to.

4. Drinking with college friends, screaming and laughing, and then 10:00 chimes and everyone starts yawning and saying that the baby kept them up.

5. Telling stories with the disclaimer, "Those were the days when there were no cell phones, of course..." Or substitute "texting," "tweeting," "blogging," "Googling," "voice mail" or "electric typewriters."

6. Standing up suddenly after lolling on the couch and going "Ow! What the hell was that?" (I think this has actually always happened, but now I sense harbingers of doom when it does.)

7. Deciding to buy a strapless neon maxi-dress/ruffled mini skirt/denim hot-pants with tights and then going "Oh, wait. I don't think I'm allowed to wear this anymore without people snickering. Damn."

8. Breaking out on my chin when my forehead needs Botox. Wasn't there some sort of cosmic deal I heard about when I was 15? You get only one or the other? What happened to that?

9. Restraining myself from reminding everyone to bring a sweater; it's supposed to get chilly later (or is that just me?)

10. Most of the time I think I look 22 (and I sure as hell feel like 22) and then I pass a mirror and go "Oh. Right."

11. It's always "'80s Night" somewhere, and I'm like, "As in that time a couple years ago when I was in college?" And yet the videos are filled with crazy clothes and crazy hair. So are my photos. The ones that are turning all yellow.

12. The fact that I can't think of anything serious and important and thoughtful and memorable to say about aging, only superficial, jokey things.


Anonymous said...

***10. Most of the time I think I look 22 (and I sure as hell feel like 22) and then I pass a mirror and go "Oh. Right."***

This! I hate that feeling.

Jen said...

Me, too. And I hear ya about the not being able to stay up late part! I have to tank up with a mocha just to get through my night class, which ends at 9:00!

I'm still ambivalent about the hair coloring thing. If I start, I feel like I can never stop (as you say). But if I wait too long to start, then everyone will know my youthful look is fake! :-)

Jen said...

p.s. A women's studies teacher once said that in many cultures, facial lines and wrinkles are a sign of wisdom and are respected. I am trying to embrace that (but wishing I lived in one of those cultures!)

Mrs. Chapman's 2nd Grade Class said...

I can related to too many of these. I still feel like I'm in my 20's and yet in reality I'm one year away from 40. Yikes. I really don't feel that old...and I know 40 isn't really old...but right now when I say that I am going to be 40 it scares me a little. Ugh! Thanks for that realization. ha! I think I'm also going a little crazy.

The mad woman behind the blog said...

I say we gang up on the AGE thing and kick the living daylights out of it.

BTW, the word "old" is not allowed in my house.

I'm with you on EVERYONE of these!

Stephanie said...

Maybe the breaking out ends when the stray hairs (on our faces)start showing up; now that's something to look forward to.

You covered something more serious a few posts back when you spoke of being more gentle with others as you are with yourself. That was lovely and memorable.

Heather - The Wanna-be Super Mom said...

#10...I totally forget that I am NOT 22. I swear I still think I have everything in common with recent college grads and interns. I'm 33...been married 9 years, owned a house for 5 and have a freakin 20 month old. Not only do I not have everything in common with them...I have NOTHING in common with them. I am utterly surprised (and saddened) when they don't find me in the least bit cool! I WAS cool once...but that was about 11 years ago.