Wednesday, January 16, 2008

She Came in through the Bathroom Window

Okay, I swore I wouldn't sully my blog (and the reputation of my daughter) by airing (ewww!) any toilet business here, but I just gotta ask:


I do not ask this question idly. I really want to know, and really, really (this is the important part) DON'T WANT TO TO DO IT.

And why don't I want to do it? Because I am LAZY.

I don't want to resort to anything Draconian, but on the other hand, I really don't want to bring food into this arena. (Yes, I'm pretty sure she would find a way to stand on her head while whistling "Old Macdonald" for an M&M.)

Two (possibly) pertinent details:

1. Each time we ask her, "Do you need to use the potty?" she replies "No, thank you." She is unfailingly polite, only in this circumstance.

2. Each time we leave the house to visit a store, restaurant, library, etc. she will suddenly seem struck with an urgent idea, and say "I need to go to the potty now!" Not wanting to send the wrong message, one of us will take her, set her up, and then begin an approximately 1-minute staring match that ALWAYS ends with "I'm done!" and NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT. And I mean NEVER. Not once.

Please help me. I'm begging you. Suggest anything that doesn't involve me staying in the house for days at a time. (See above where I wrote "I am LAZY.") Or shake me vigorously until the film falls from my eyes and I am blinded by the glory of the truth.

I figure it's gotta be one or the other.


Type (little) a aka Michele said...

You are aware of my credentials as a lazy mom, I'm sure, so I will spare you the details.

That being said: Bite the bullet and do the naked juice box toddler thing, That method requires some tenacity (and frequent smoke-breaks for me) but my daughter got day trained in 3 days.

Did I ever send you that PDF of Jack booted potty training techniques? I followed it pretty slavishly, except that I used pull ups at night for a few months.

Sam said...

I have not seen this jack-booted .pdf, Type. Send away. :)

What shall I do instead of smoke breaks? Crack breaks? ;)

Jenn said...

Does she show any interest in the potty? Is her BFF Joy potty trained? Maybe the peer pressure thing would help?

There is a long weekend coming up so maybe between you and David over the 3 days of nakedness and juice boxes and maybe doing it with her friend and her parents and you'd all have a break and support?

I totally rambled...but it's late and I am tired and it's just a thought. GOOD LUCK!

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

Here is the question every parent and child have to work out: Who will be The Decider?

Anonymous said...

My hubby was not too keen on the peeing all over the house method (that's how he saw it anyway), perhaps it's different with a girl...more dribbling than projectile peeing...?

Is she a stubborn one, your little Jarrah? If not, what worked for us might work for you. We did the shopping for the training pants (cotton undies with the thick double paneling in the appropriate areas) together first and built up to the fact of what was approaching.

We skipped the kid potty altogether, why then have to make the switch to the regular toilet, and who wants to clean the potty 40times a day? Yuck. This lazy mom wanted nothing to do with that.

I did the take the kid to the toilet every 20-30 minutes routine, and we surely did not stay home for this and adjusted the timeframe pretty dramatically when we were away from home. Don't ask, just take her. Def got in the habit of going before we went anywhere and upon arrival etc. Carried around a well stocked diaper bag for the first time and did more laundry than I had in the past. We never ran to a bathroom ever though--i think it freaks the kid out and when there were mistakes we acted like it was no big deal, that we'd try again next time. The biggest "reward" he got was a "good job" and the privilege of getting to flush the toilet. (That was big incentive for him, as he wasn't allowed to previously). Oh, there was, and still is a little song that I sung that I think triggers him even now.

I know you can do it! ;0

Anonymous said...

What's the method at school?

Sam said...

Jenn--Yes, BFF Joy is trained. You'd think Jarrah would care, but lo, she does not. :)

Cheri--I like your photo!

Kind Anonymous--thank you! Yes, she's a stubborn one! :) I like the idea of the special pants, and skipping the little potty (but I guess I need a tall step-stool?) I also laughed at the idea of running like crazy at the first mention of pottying in public; I can see how that would lead to accidents. :) I appreciate your wisdom.

2nd Kind Anonymous--you know, much as I love Jarrah's school, there is no method there. They are not enforcers. When Jarrah says "No, thank you," they don't push it. I kinda wish they would!

storiesoftravel said...

First get this:

much easier than doing the small potty thing - no cleaning etc..we used ONE m & m -and ONLY if pp in potty - there are/were no other treats given - for any reason - and don't ask if they have to go - take her - set the timer on the microwave - and every 20 or 30 mins - in you go - if even a dribble - REWARD - if nothing a pat on the back - and a thanks for trying - of course fill her up with fluids - no tv - (as that is when my little one had 99% of her accidents-and YES on the thick panties
go here:

for tones of great info - you can get the panties on ebay - for less (and yes they are new).
Patience - sometimes I was at my wits end - so this too shall pass - to bad you can't send then away for a day to potty class and they come back all trained!!!
Good Luck!

Beth said...

I have enjoyed reading your blog for some time now. We also have a little girl adopted from the Chongqing Children's Home and she will be 4 tomorrow. I thought she would never get potty trained either, but this past summer I had to do it or else she would not be able to go to preschool. One day I told my husband by the end of the day she would be potty trained. I made a sticker chart, told her that everytime she went she would get a sticker and a small prize from the prize box. Put on her big girl undies and she did it, never even put pull ups on her at night, she was trained within 3 days with only 2 accidents. She was 3 and 1/2. Grandma sent her big girl undies and new p.j.s in the mail when she was all trained. My boys were both potty trained by the time they were 3, so I guess all kids are different. Good Luck!

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

How's it going, dear Sam? Laura and Jarrah have their own minds, to be sure. I tried logic. "Laura, babies wear diapers and big girls wear panties." Laura sighed and patiently explained, "Mommy, I'm a big girl who wears a diaper." She spared me the "duh" at the end, but it was in her tone. She liked the Once Upon a Potty book (and video), and if you buy the real-life version of the featured potty, you will find my endorsement printed on the box. Having said that, no reward worked for my child, although stickers worked well for my first child. So, despite the books that say to wait for the child to show signs of readiness, I did it when I decided I was ready. I put away the diapers, and Laura backed up her stated preference for the floor with repeated demonstrations. Each time I handed her rags with which to clean her mess, and when she grew tired of cleaning up after herself, she started using the potty. Thankfully, much of our house at the time was floored in Italian tile. My thoughts are with you.

Dear me, I may have written a little post of my own in your comments section. XOXOXO

Sam said...

Hi Cheri!

We get that "duh" face here, too. I told Jarrah that big girls don't have diapers, and she walked over to her drawer, pulled it open, pointed and said, "Mommy, I have LOTS of diapers."

Just two nights ago, she developed an, ahem, NEW preference for the floor. And we don't have tile. ARGH! Must try that rag trick. ;)

We have "Once Upon a Potty," but I think the novelty has worn off. I think we need the video!

Chinazhou, thanks for the great tips, and you, too, Beth. All of this is helping. The biggest thing we're doing already (based on all your feedback) is we've stopped asking, and hence, no more polite refusals. ;)

Gratitude to everyone!

Smitten Knitten said...

One thing we did with Yea-Yea to help move things along was plastic pants and cloth trainers. She did not like being wet at all and that really motived her to use the potty.

Anonymous said...

Dearest Sam,

Having just completed potty training myself, I can recommend coffee & lots of it, or J. Dust's favorite highly caffeinated beverage. After about 12 ozs. of coffee, there's no stopping me getting to the bathroom in time!!

Seriously, I have no advice (obviously) so I'm not even going to pretend. Good luck, though!!!