Melancholy morning. It's September, and though it doesn't really happen around here, I always start hearing "But I miss you most, my darling/When autumn leaves start to fall" in my head. This afternoon, I believe we can go see who Jarrah's new teacher will be, and I feel weird about that. I'm also feeling a bit blue that I had two really long auditions this week (one regular, one callback) but could tell during the callback that my star was falling, as the director read me--just once--for four different parts, when I'd only been called back for one. Not a good sign. I mean, it might mean he sorta liked me, but by the end, it also meant he wasn't going to cast me.
I have another audition next week, but must confess that my excitement for these things tends to peak very quickly, and just as quickly plummet down the other side. I think I've started a bit of that. I've also had a few too many nights of greeting David as he returns from work "I'm getting ready! Don't talk to me! Find yourselves something for dinner!" before sprinting to the car, carefully constructed curls bouncing around my face, lips sticky with gloss.
I had a bad dream last night that I was lost in a dark, dark city that was supposed to be Melbourne (seemed more like Italy) on a scooter, trying to navigate my way back to people I knew with an awful lot of hazards from cobblestones and twisty staircases. I was frightened and lonely, and when I opened my eyes, it seemed like it had been going on forever.
Jarrah and I are both listless today, and she even shocked me by refusing the neighbors' invitation to the park. "Are you sick?" I asked, but she doesn't seem to be. The neighbors are also wanting to take Jarrah to church, which is a situation I haven't been in before. I feel like I wanna just say "Thanks, but we're Jewish!" so why don't I? It's awkward.
Guess I'm just having trouble with summer ending. It's been a fast, crazy one, beginning with our Australia trip, followed quickly by the bathroom remodel and Comic-Con, diving into stand-up comedy, sliding into 48 Hours filming, screening and celebrating, and screeching finally into five auditions in ten days, so I guess I've become a bit of an adrenaline junkie along the way and am having trouble with the idea of structure and schedule showing up to spoil my party. But I know the fall will bring new adventures, right, Readers?
Speaking of which, are you out there? A few people have told me they're having trouble accessing the comments--I guess if you are one of those you won't be able to chime in. I'll try to figure it out. In the mean time, thanks for stopping by--I appreciate you.