Whassup?

I'm back. Did you miss me?

This is the longest blog hiatus I've ever taken. Now that I've actually had THREE separate complaints about it from unrelated parties, I promise never to do it again. You like me; you really like me!

I was telling my friend Stephanie that I could use the ol' "I'm so BUSY and v. important!" excuse, since I do have three brand-new things in my life since January. But I actually hate when other people do that (it seems to imply that everyone else's schedule is chopped liver) so I won't. And the real reason is that, now that I'm deep into those three things, I want to do what comes naturally and bitch about all of them. And that's not very...safe. (What, did you think I was going to say "nice?")

So I won't do that. But feel free to drop me an e-mail and you'll get an earful. I do take requests.

On a happier, less-bitchy note, (and really, the bitchy stuff is happy, too--after all, when am I more in my element than when I'm kvetching with great relish and gusto, on pumpernickel?) we had a Super-Sized Fun weekend last weekend, so much fun that we're spending this weekend recovering. Oh, we've had a little fun this weekend, too. Rango, we saw your movie. Very impressed with your Method. And today we took a BIG risk and took Jarrah to see my favorite play, The Importance of Being Earnest--a really amazing production and let's just say I was massively grateful for the Phineas and Ferb comic book in my purse. Much more grateful than the woman next to us who got two hours of seat-swinging and wall-kicking and "Why are they YELLING at each other if they're FRIENDS?"

So, last weekend we had four events (not counting the rehearsal I led until 10:30 p.m. Friday night!): the annual Chinese New Year banquet, the preschool auction dinner, my friend Jane's baby shower, and...the Oscars! (I'm tired just listing all that.)

There is very little photographic evidence of the first three events, but we did get a couple food porn photos of the aforementioned national holiday at our place. Each year, we have over a couple people who are willing to abide by the rules: no coming late, no leaving early, and no talking during the good bits. Most people chafe at these requirements--can you imagine? So it works for us to keep it teeny-tiny. In addition to The Social Network Appletinis you see pictured, there were Black Swan Martinis (white chocolate with black sugar rims) and Toy Story Lots o' Huggin Gummy Bears, The King's Speech cucumber and walnut tea sandwiches, True Grit BBQ, and cupcakes for...well, because we like cupcakes, okay? It didn't seem quite right to have a Winter's Bone Home Meth Lab or 127 Hours Trail Mix, but there was an attempt at The Kids Are All Right No-Nuts Brownies that didn't quite pan out.

It was a beautiful evening, chock-full o' laughter and frivolity. The rest of the weekend rocked, too. It was the best-ever CNY banquet--great friends, great food, a totally rad kung fu demo, beautiful music, thrilling lion dancers, and we even won some Hornblower cruises in the raffle! My friend Melissa, who helms this occasion, laughs at me, but I even adore the post-event clean-up--there is something so soothing about sweeping an entire banquet hall.

There was just time to get home and pretty up for the auction--our first (and perhaps only?) since Jarrah graduated from our beloved preschool. This was also the first year I wasn't working (or, like last year, MC-ing with laryngitis) and I did it up: a couple of Cosmos, repeat trips to the dessert bar, gabbing with everyone in sight (we seemed to know everyone!), and lots of "winning," including swim lessons, theater tickets, a restaurant gift card, wine tasting and a visit to the Carlsbad Flower Fields.

A moment of gratitude before I sign off, since I'm feeling maudlin tonight: all joking aside, I am humbled by my role as director of The Vagina Monologues. I am getting to know the most incredible women--funny, bawdy, smart, dedicated and so willing to put themselves out there for whatever I suggest. I only wish we had more than one night to experience that powerful stage magic together. I hope some of you will make it to the show so you won't have to take my word for how awesome they are, and how lucky I am!