Saturday, November 06, 2010

And Tell Snowball I Said Hi

You know what I can't stand? When I'm on the phone and the other person says:

"Well, I'm going to let you go."

I'm not that much of a phone person, so I don't hear it often, and I certainly don't know a lot of people who say it. But when they do say it, they always say it the same way. And it sounds like this:

"Well, I sure am tired of talking to you. I don't actually need to do anything right now, have nowhere to be, nothing is boiling over on the stove, my kids are not trying to kill each other, no cop is giving me the stink eye because I forgot my Blu-Tooth, but...the fact remains that this call is done for me. So...I'm going to go and make it look like I'm doing you a favor. Just out of the goodness of my heart. That way, it's a win-win. I get to stop having this boring conversation, and you think I'm keenly aware of your needs, so much so that I can sense them without you saying a word."

And are people really thinking/implying all that when they use those seven (eight if you don't want a contraction) little words? I don't know. But that's what it always seems like to me. Interestingly, the people who say this are never the ones I've been gabbing with for an hour. No, we've just had a three-minute exchange that involved some sort of time and place negotiation, and a couple pleasantries about the family. Now we are finished, apparently.

So what's my problem? It kinda hurts my feelings. Because it feels so disingenuous. It makes me feel like we don't really know each other very well. Because if we did, I think they would say:

"I gotta go. I really need to go watch Gossip Girl and eat Halloween candy. Talk to you soon. By the way? You're the best."

Now that's more like it.

Readers, how about you? Which little turns of phrase, posing as social niceties (or not!) drive you batty?


Caroline said...

I'm probably one of the people who say that, and I apologize. I never thought about it hurting anyone's feelings. I say it because I'm always 100% positive that I'm intruding on something the other person would rather be doing, that they grunted when they saw my number and rolled their eyes when they answered. So it's my way of apologizing for being such a pain.

I even do that with Russell.

I am a very healthy person with high self esteem. And no phone-phobia at all. :)

Sam said...

C, I have never heard you do that. :) Just for the record. :) And I had to laugh when you said the bit about rolling my eyes and grunting. Darling, I never roll my eyes when I answer the phone. I JUST DON'T ANSWER. Which I would never, ever do (not do?) to you. :)

Anonymous said...

I thought I might comment here but instead, I'm gonna let you go.

You're the best & I have to watch football now (soon).


P.S. Lots of leaves in the yard. Come & help!!

Sam said...

LOL, T!!!! :)

Keep that rake handy for me. Those leaves are MINE. :)

Anonymous said...

I know I've said that before! Even though I also agree with you that it is a bit passive aggressive. But I think I have pulled it out when I was speaking to someone who just wouldn't let me get off the phone.

I have lots of these pet peeves (English major) but 2 are the misuse of "literally" to mean "very"-- "I was literally climbing the walls" -- and the use of "legendary" to describe people or things that are just famous (although this seems to be permitted by certain dictionaries, it still always sounds so silly to me).

x Lix

Logical Libby said...

I hate it when people act surprised you picked up. LIke they were really hoping to just leave a message...

Jen said...

I hate "I could care less!"

Also, it's now sleeting all over our yard full of crunchy autumn leaves. :-)

Sam said...

@Lix: Totally guilty of both of those. Even though the first one also drives me bats. Go figure. ;)

@Libby: That annoys me, too! And yet seems so very contemporary. ;)

@Miss J: So sorry about your lovely leaves! And I agree with you on that one. But also sometimes do it. I am a huge hypocrite. :)

Michelle said...

"Just out of curiosity" followed by a rude question. Grrr. I do laugh to myself when people say "I'm going to let you go." I have a friend who says, "OK, let me go so. . ." Kind of a fun twist, huh?

I'll have to think of more. I get easily annoyed.

Oh, using "infamous" incorrectly. Blah.

DrSpouse said...

"I don't mean to be rude/offend you but"... which means "I'm definitely going to be rude but if you are offended it's your fault"